All posts by jacktrismegistus

I am called Jack. I am an incarnation of all the Jack's that have ever been. My opinions and philosophies are a reflection of said Jack's. The blog is entitled Inglorious Resurrection because like you I have been granted yet another chance, and like you each chance granted becomes more degenerative than the previous. And like you, I yearn for a way out. Jack is my only glimpse of hope because there is a lil Jack in all of us.

30 for 30 Rand University (A response)

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A reflection upon a revealing documentary… Although, I felt the documentary was insightful, It appears to be a story within a story. A story unfulfilled because to be quite frank the story is uncomplete– a skeleton without muscle or organs. The documentary is centered around polarizing professional athlete Randy Moss (one of my favorites). Like so many other melaninated athletes the documentary depicts his plight from tremendous odds to athletic immortality. The documentary explores his troubles with the law as a youth. His psychological response to racism (a people who want you only for your athletic prowess and nothing more). Also, his perpetual fight with the myopia that the small town life fostered. And his overcoming perseverance that led to his seemingly apparent success…This documentary addresses it all.

A private figure… Randy actually opened up and shed a light upon a portion of who he is. This allowed insight into the psyche of so many young melaninated males in similar dichotomies.

I describe this as a story half told because of an aspect of the documentary that struct a nerve with me. The documentary is entitled Rand University. This is attributed to the fact that there are so many exceptional athletes produced in that region but never make it “out”. In fact most of em “end up drinking 40 ounces outside of 7-11” This is what the locals deem Rand University. All the prodigious athletes graduate high ftschool and attend an existence of nothingness and forsaken hope.

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This is an exponential tragedy because Rand University have campuses in every state in every city in every town across the United States of America. So many young men are living under a delusion.. A very strong delusion… The implanted truth that the only road to success in America is through being praised by America. The avenues to being praised or beloved or embraced by America is through physical prowess(athletics) or showmanship (musician or entertainer). This is a grave tragedy. An unspoken axiom that goes unchecked and unchallenged. And I myself am not exempt from this delusion.. Growing up, even I thought that that was the only means of “success”. I do not know where this mentality came from exactly. I do not know where it took root. It wasn’t as though I was not exposed to professionals of melanin. It just always seemed as though nothing else was attainable. It seemed “possible” and I knew I had the “ability” but it never felt real or achievable…

What general consensus has swept young melaninated people’s to put all their hope in their ability to be embraced by the masses. Without that “love” they feel worthless. Without that hope they are cursed to live a destitute life of nothingness.. As I said I am of no exception.. I was always told to go to college… But I never felt or saw an end game. This has stunted my “progress” in life. I saw college as an ends… Not a means to an end and this has left me some what stuck… Trying to figure it all out. I’m at least lucky enough to have the wherewithal to try to figure it out.. As this documentary highlights, there are so many of my brothers who simply lose hope after the initial dream is shattered.. After one run in with the law… After one ill placed tragedy… They are left with nothing…. No direction… No ambition.. And without hope!

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There is one part in the documentary that embodies this spirit. It’s when one of Randy Moss’ childhood friends who didn’t “make it out” is recounting his mishap.. Retelling how he lost his opportunity.. He simply broke down and cried. As though his world no longer had meaning because of a dream unfulfilled. Yet, in reality he is a young man… Under the age of 40… He has all the world to gain… No matter the circumstance it all can turn around… It starts with one idea and a whole lot of drive and determination.

But, so many of our brethren don’t have that idea… That thought never enters their mind. The seed just lands on harsh soil and never takes root.

Why?

How do you break this psychosis if it alone defines your reality? And you know nothing beyond your reality…

Is it the responsibility of a society to look after its individuals? Is it the responsibility of the individual to save himself by any means necessary? Is this mentality of individualism productive to the collective? How does an individual with nothing to lose react when they feel it’s them against the world? Who seeks to gain from the decisions that this individual will potentially make. Prison industrial complex? Illicit drug industry? Etc?

So we are left with an untold story. The story of one shining star. One individual who defied the odds. A survival of the fittest narrative played out to perfection. Yet, the nature of humanity isn’t so much a survival of the fittest, but a survival of the collective. The true issue is why so many individuals are innately not part of the collective unless they “earn” their way in. Why are some born on the outside looking in? Why is that generally accepted?

Why must one earn their way into a society that they have no way of escaping?

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SHINE…. Shine… shine… (A poem by Jack)

I seen a lot of brilliant minds thrown to the wayside..

It saddens me…

Lights shown with the potential of brilliance… Barely able to flicker..

No fire burns… Just a vestige of embers…of what could of been…

Any god that gives up on me is no god of mine…

Perhaps with enough hell their fire will reignite… And flame ablaze…

Sometimes I love myself… And wish the world would too…

Other times I love myself and don’t give a damn who agrees…

But it’s the times when my ugliness prevails…and I feel exactly human and my light slowly dims… And I don’t so much love myself… Just the sole thought of escaping this tragedy becomes my infatuation…

Perhaps on the moons of Jupiter I can reside and love myself forever…

Or perhaps the grass will always be greener… Perhaps my flame was designed to simply flicker…

Oh just bury me in the back of the subconscious.. Make me inexistent…

This lil light of mine.. May have never been meant to shine…

Reconcile me by my Truths… (A poem by Jack)

The reconciliation of duality..

Who you think you are versus who you really are… What you’re deemed to be…

What you are never changes from this life to the next… The source will always be there… But the power of the Who is enough to make or break a man..

So we deal with extremes and polar opposites… Constantly rationalizing the two in this brain of ours…

Who is the greater… Who is the lesser…

I feel fickle and unrooted…

Am I a human? Then allow me to run the gamma of my emotion… If I’m human let me feel all there is to be human…

If I’m god… Let me create… Let me draw from the infinite and manifest that which is without form…

If I’m less than a man… Well then keep me stonewalled… Angry.. And stoic… Operating like a machine impervious to emotions… Repressed free will translated as the ego… Kept in check…

What exactly am I?

The reconciliation of infinite dualities… All converging at one point… One moment… One soul…

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How long will we allow Religion to Rape our Spirituality…

The exploitation of spirituality by religions across the world…

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Spirituality and religion are two realms that can be mutually exclusive but happen to coincide more often than necessary.   If I dare use this comparison: I view Spirituality as the victim of a psychologically abusive abductor in the form of Religion.  This may be quite a sensitive subject because, as Stockholm syndrome would dictate, we have fallen in love with our capturer.  We are under the illusion, a comfortable subjective truth, that Religion is dogma—that religion is absolute truth, that religion is our savior.  Since our capturer has provided all of our spiritual pfood, shelter, comfort, and fulfillment—it must certainly be the complete gamma of what spirituality has to offer.  We have identified with our capturer so much so that some of us have laid down our lives in the name of our religion.  Some of us have murdered in the name of our religion.  Some of us have stolen innocence and destroyed entire cultures in the name of our religion.  Some have sacrificed our first born in the name of our religion. So, what is this phenomenon known as religion and why is it distinguishable from spirituality?

Is there more to a spirit than what the constraints of language, imagery, expectation, and imagination can conceive?

I consider Religion a parasite.  A contrived parasite that has latched on to something very real that is spirituality– a living breathing entity that is constantly evolving.  As per my philosophy we (at least a fair portion of us) are light or spirit beings having a human experience.  However one may choose to articulate the matter: whether we be vibrational beings, energy beings, or light beings to me it is all leading to the same source.  One’s spirituality can not be denied or hidden.  Most have an innate sense that we’re here for a “greater purpose”.  Most have an unquenchable thirst to know “why” they are “here”.  The seed has been sown in all of us.  Now this journey to the source isn’t necessary easy or necessarily our purpose.  But religion has provided a gross over-simplification of a complex issue.

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Religion has taken the concept of spirituality and held it hostage.  What is meant to be a means of freedom, a means of open communication of information, a medium of exchange, a medium of healing, a medium of empowerment has been replaced.  It has been replaced with strict dogmas that reduce everything to the black and white.  It has been replaced with spiritual atrophy. Man is convinced to disempower themselves and allow for their savior or external source to dictate the fates of their lives.

Many of the underdeveloped gifts that spirituality has bestowed upon us bleed through the oppression of religion.  There are revelatory gifts that some encompass in which religion cannot quiet.   There are untapped resources of physical self-healing that exist despite being taught otherwise. They call it the placebo effect—but it’s nothing more than the nescient or nascent ability of the mind to heal using our spiritual strengths.  Some of us have the ability to manifest our own futures by “speaking things into existence” and others have the ability of foresight (to know what is to come of us).  Ever been thinking of something and the person next to you seemingly reads your mind—and verbalizes what you were thinking?  Perhaps this was preverbal spiritual truth—how we as beings communicated before our de-evolution into our current state.

I do not know all of the gifts that our spirits have to offer but I am aware enough to know that they exist and have courage enough not to deny their presence.  But this is not an exposition of man’s gifts.  This is an exposition of how the regulation of these gifts has been used to victimize us.  How these gifts have been stifled and replaced with a rudimentary quality of life and existence. Some of the most powerful beings on this planet have the slightest idea of their potential.  Brilliant minds and brilliant souls are falling to the wayside. –And in the name of what?

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Now I don’t want to completely condemn religion because it does have its place.  It can be the building block of something special.  It teaches discipline and can provide a launching off point of where spirituality can take us.  We all have various levels of intelligence and discernment and maybe religion can be something great for a portion of society.  But to deem it the end all be all is tragic– fatal. And it keeps the gifted among us from being valued, from elevating our species, and helping to repair our collective consciousness.

How do we break the chains of our oppressor?  How do we leave our oppressor if we love our oppressor?  Is being in captivity so bad if I’m being taken care of?

When one manipulates the possibilities of the inevitable it impedes growth.  When you start people off and dictate the end result of their life before they are even born there is no room for growth. Their whole life is oriented towards achieving one destination or avoiding the other.  Spirits are meant to grow, expand, engage, create, and so forth.  None of this is possible when the possibilities don’t exist in the mind…If the possibilities can’t even be fathomed.. The existence can’t even begin to be manifested…

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Armageddon… The darkness behind the light… (a poem by Jack)

Mimicry..

There’s an outcry of false injustice…

How can I be me… If you’re being me…

An echo of the original..

Steadily twisting and mutating my truth into a conception of miseducation…

Informing the world that your distortion and disfigurement is me..

Oh you liar.. Cursed is the minute I bore you and near is the hour of your punishment…

And you can’t hide behind a mirror… You can’t hide among the clones…
The soulless rebels you created who lack judgement and intuition…
They will not save you for they shall bow to me…

The original…

Every knee…
Every tongue shall confess…

As spirit envelopes spirit… And energy supersedes technologies… The vibrational atonement crushes logic… And you as well as your carbon copies will cry out for a savior…

And I will turn a death ear… Let your words and machines save you…let your logic and reason provide a way…

Evolve into your own savior… For a hollow mimicry of me will provide you no love… No peace… And no safe haven… Only your final resting place…

Those titans who were once banished… Those things that go bump in the night are all under our dominion… And if need be.. When enough is enough… Chaos will thrive til it can’t thrive no more…

Lost Boys… (Americaville…) (A poem by Jack)

Our only sin…

Thinking we can be anything we wanted to be…
Lofty dreams… Pompous ideals… Shot down by the arrows of depression and expectation unfulfilled..

See, this journey… We began without map.. Compass… Or sense of direction…

They call us lost boys… Animals.. Criminals… Nihilist… Without a purpose we roam… Without pride we scourge…

In cages we’re thrown… In the streets we’re gunned down… By others… By each other… By whoever…

It’s ok… Because they were lost…

Blame it on me… Blame it on the system.. Blame it on whoever… Cause it doesn’t matter… Least not to you…

So where do our lost boys go… Where is their land of milk and honey… Where do they grow to become men…

Ensnared in a vicious cycle of kidulthood… Left to roam for eternity…
40 days and 40 nights of searching and searching…
Days of ridicule… Nights of spite… Days of reprieve… Nights of intoxication…
Drowning out the voices… Drowning out the echoes..
What’s a boy to do when becoming a man is no option…
No beard… No hunting… No gathering… No family… No worth…

Devalued… Left to rot… Guilded… And the cycle continues… Another boy is born and picks up where the other left off…

They stripped us…

They raped us…

The molested us…

They robbed us of our inheritance…

Left us abandoned… Wallowing in our own filth… And told us to find our way home…

A boy can’t traverse a path designed for a man… A boy can’t go home if he has the slightest idea who he is…

All what’s left to do… But look up at the stars.. And ask.. Am I meant to be here?

Curse the stars! They snatched us from our cradle… They forced us to be their cup bearers… Passed around among em.. In a state of catharsis… Zombified… So embellished with the torture that we grow numb to it’s impact…

We simply act and do without thinking… And when they are done… We’re left to rot and birth another…

Another to be just like us… In form… In function…

Another born with original sin…another Christ forced to self-sacrifice…crucified… With no hope of resurrection…

The Un-Private Collection: Kara Walker and Ava DuVernay

Insight into this jewel of an artist I recently became aware of… Her work “A Subtlety” inspired my precious blog post.. Hope to discover more of Kara…

Ourstorian's avatarOurstorian

Provocative artist Kara Walker will be in conversation with Ava DuVernay, filmmaker and winner of the 2012 Sundance Best Director Award. Two of the most celebrated artists working today, both use narratives drawn from real life experiences to tell important stories from the perspective of African-American women. The recent success of Kara Walker’s Sugar Baby installation at the Domino Sugar factory in Brooklyn and Ava DuVernay’s much anticipated film Selma are bringing difficult yet vital American histories to a wide-ranging public. This dialogue will be an opportunity to hear insights on their art making across the disciplines of visual art and filmmaking.

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Rebuilding the Black Woman… Guardians of our Souls..

Kara Walker’s piece ” A Subtlety” is the launch point of this blog. An image that has provided the impetus for an exploration of our subconscious mind’s primary motif– an artistic requiem of glory lost.

Front depiction of the sculpture...
Front depiction of the sculpture…
A rear view of the sculpture...
A rear view of the sculpture…

This blog will begin to scratch the surface regarding the significance of the image of the Black Woman. It is a reflection upon the restoration of the Black-woman archetype and her/its importance to humanity.

One look upon Kara Walker’s work opens up the vastness of a million portals–portals leading to truths of both past and present. In this larger-than-life sculpture, Kara depicts a modern rendition of a Sphinx like figure. We have the likeness of a woman crafted out of all white sugar. The woman has a “mammy” resemblance to her that is accentuated by the adornment of her crown with a scarf–something you may be used to seeing atop the head of Harriet Tubman. Her bust is large and exposed as if she were offering her bosom for suckling to any onlooker. In place of an animal body the figure maintains its womanly-curvaceous physique. All capped off by a vagina exposed from the rear view of the sculpture. Depending on the frame of reference of the viewer, we have a hyper-sexualized image of a woman. All the while the woman has a smirk on her face. Almost like she is taunting the observer to explore the depths that she has to offer. As if to say you can scratch the surface but you have the slightest idea how deep it can get.

Sphinx

Sphinx

We can juxtapose this image to that of the actual Sphinx. The image of a regal guardian spirit that stands poised in protecting her city– from a spiritual stand point and an authoritative stand point– a guardian queen if you will.

The two images side by side depict how far the Black Woman has been exiled from her thrown. And also the moral degradation that has gone hand in hand with this vanquishing of her archetype…

power
power

The archetype of the Black Woman has a universally visceral response to all that experience it. Her presence is never subtle. It is encompassing and this is evident on both a conscious and subconscious level. The vibrations that her spirit gives off is undeniable and often commands respect in one fashion or another.

She has fallen from the Creator-of-Man era…

To the Queen– the Ruler-of-Man era..

To the Mammy the Caretaker-of-Man era….

Too the hyper-sexualized– the Whore-of-Man era…

And along with her fall from grace has come the destruction of societal morality and spirituality. Yet her fall has not been of a natural order. It has been carried out in a systematic manner by the would be ruler of the present era. Her ruling archetype type has been assaulted and bombarded by her rival and polar opposite that of the White Male. A patriarchal dominated society who’s morality encompasses all but not limited to: greed, avarice, licentiousness, wanton, gluttony, selfishness, and anything else that appeals to one’s flesh induced desires.
This patriarchal archetype whether it be consciously or subconsciously is perpetually attempting to strip the Black female archetype of all power and authority. Yet as the “Subtlety” has proven… You can change her image but she will never leave her post…

As per popular culture the image of the Black woman is both imitated and mocked. There is a relentless assault upon the motif of the Black Woman. She is often both ridiculed and mimicked–creating a paradox of a unique kind. On the one level she is mocked but on a deeper level she can’t help but to be imitated as she is the purveyor of all civilization.

There is attempt to bring about a new way among the people of this planet. The key to providing the perfect segue into this way of being is the removal of our humanity. And the cornerstone of our humanity is the Black woman. There is an attempt to usher in a new era. One in which man is devoid of spirituality… Devoid of uniqueness.. Devoid of his bond with the universe… Supplanting himself as above or without integration into nature.. Almost as though we were transfiguring ourselves into machines…

Our humanity is what is at stake. There is a war going on that no man is safe from. And if we don’t protect our guardians on the most basic of levels. How do we expect them to protect us on the most critical of level–that which can not be seen and is ever changing? How long can they stand guard if they lack sense of Self? And we lack sense of perspective?

Quicksand and Fractured Souls… (A poem by Jack)

Can’t even scratch the surface…

The depths of her complexity can not be fathomed…

But the depths of my shadows are quite evident…
All-encompassing… The shadows have absorbed all light and devoured my being…

I am a black hole– my misery has swallowed me whole.. I have no means of escape…

I am hatred.. Pointed in all directions… My blows are both self-indulging and self-induced… Flooding with self-pity..

I feel the sharpness of pain… A blade slicing through the shadows…a warm blade that drips of blackness… Slicing through the dark with precision… a harnessed chaos with every stroke …

I am melancholy… Because beyond the horizon is a field of bleak… A barren field.. Fruitless and of despair… The perfect resting place for a fallen warrior…

I am fear… Because my enemy does not exist… All I see is black… All I hear are whispers… All I can feel is void… How can one fight what one can’t know is real…

I am self destructive…. I am crushed within myself.. I can’t see outside the black hole… All that I know resides within the darkness…

Where is the light? Who has my hope… Despair echoes answers.. But his veracity is questionable..

Subtle hints… My only means of encouragement… Whispers from an unknown source… From an unknown space.. With an unknown message…

Stars Bursting into a Sea of Immorality ( A poem by Jack)

Sun drenched…

And sun dried…

Wave after wave crashing against my spine..

An entire ocean of retribution..
From past sins coming home to roost after years of neglect..

Wave after wave crashing…

As I sit there piecing it all together… Not understanding the tide of the devil’s hand.. But maneuvering and evading through the prickling of His fingers..
Death is of little threat… But the coercion of my being.. My motivation is within the gallows..

Wave after Wave bears down on my back…

Lash after lash thickens my hide…
Sin after sin diminishes my soul…
But breath after breath restores my spirit…
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Step after step invites perseverance…
The suns rays command me rise up!
And face the ocean… Look my demons in the eye.. And part the sea if need Be…

Or elevate above the chaos.. Shed the malaise and saunter across the surface of the voracious waters…

As the waters move along forever…. The sea seems infinite…And so does I and the journey I must become…

Perpetual evolution of the infinite being within finite structures…

Structures that crumble and fade.. With the caprice of the wind…
The breath of life restoring me anew…

Stars Bursting…

Twinkling…

Rise Phoenix Rise…

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